Does your choice of 4×4 say a lot about who you are? Or, let me put that another way: Are some vehicle brands more associated with off-road hooligans than others? The thing about generalisations is that they’re generally based on general truths. 

If you haven’t guessed it, this column is in response to Andrew St Pierre White’s recent video where he states that he would not own a Nissan Patrol because they’re commonly associated with rednecks who fit big tyres and act like off-road hooligans.

As a former Nissan Patrol owner and self-confessed hooligan, I’m not going to argue with his points because… well… I love the Nissan Patrol, I love big tyres, and yeah, I love to hear that 4.8-litre engine on its limiter. 

However, there’s a time and place to act like a blockhead, and as Andrew points out, ecologically sensitive areas, with other travellers around, are obviously not that place. You only need to be a half-decent human to know this.

Now, it must be said that I often disagree with Andrew’s views; however, I do respect that he shares them, and I appreciate that he’s not afraid to rock the boat.

In a round-about way, Andrew’s video is quite complimentary of the Patrol, where he essentially states that the vehicle’s extreme strength and build quality lends itself to hooliganisms off-road.

Naturally, the video has upset a few Patrol owners who don’t see themselves as unwashed rednecks and view the video as quite critical. I suppose no one likes to be pigeonholed, but in my own experience, this is more a petrol vs diesel topic rather than a Patrol vs everything else. 

The fact is, big petrol engines like to rev, and the people who like to rev them will do so. This applies to 3.6-litre Jeeps, 4.0-litre Toyotas, V8 Land Rovers, 4.5-litre EFI Cruisers, and so on.

Associating certain vehicle brands with the actions of certain owners is not unlike the popular gun debate where people seemly tar certain “black rifle” owners with a particular brush. But I’m not going to go there.

As for why I sold my own Patrol? Well, it’s a decision I cry about every night, but the short answer is: Life’s too short for automotive monogamy. I’ll let faithfulness guide me in my marriage, but when it comes to 4x4s, I’m a brand whore and a Hugh Hefner wannabe.

P.S. Patrols rule all… but I won’t say no to a 76.

… or a FJ

… or a TJ

… or a Tdi 

… or a HSE

… or a JB74

… or another XJ with a LS2

*closes laptop and sobs about Patrol*